Thursday, November 12, 2020

The Specifics of what Happened

 If you don't want specific details as we know them, skip this part!!!




As copied from my prior post to Daddy's Facebook page.

So. Waited to make this post until I, Pam, had gotten in the last of the paperwork from the hospital. This will be a long read, and as accurate as possible under the circumstances. But, we are still hearing from folks that are just hearing that Daddy went home, so I felt this was needed. Understand, Daddy was never one to admit he could be sick. He had cared for mom and wasn't about to have that happen to him. I tracked Daddy down on the evening of Nov. 5 (he missed our normal Tuesday morning call) after I called, messaged, and texted...he finally called me back. He had gone in with bloody stools to Perryville Hospital on Monday, was taken by ambulance on Tuesday to St. Francis in Cape Gerardo, Missouri. He told me that they didn't know what was wrong, he just felt weak and wanted to sleep. I should look up the hospital and ask them for info. So, I did just that. Was told that he had a gastro intestinal bleed, and they were stumped. A prior test showed a mass on his lung, but that could be the pnemonia or there could also be something under that. He'd complained of pain in his hip bones, but closterphobia had kept him from his MRI. He had to schedule another one, he had not done that yet. He was on a drip to calm his heart and he was stable. Platelet count when he came in was from 109 down to 99, by 8pm it was 68. Should we come? Not now. Got a call back...moved to ICU and was having an emergency upper GI. Results between 10 and 11pm.  Two ulcers, most likely from Tylenol and baby aspirin. Looking at lower GI in the morning. Oh, and they were giving him blood. He ended up getting three units before it was over. Call back in the morning.  Morning nurse... Come. It's looking like cancer. GI doctor said they had to wait, he was too week. Keeping him on antibiotics. 7am and platelets down to 59. Kidney numbers were triple what they should be, liver numbers were up. He's still stable, but talking about dying and made sure they had his DNR. My sister and I packed, my hubby got released from jury duty, my niece and my daughter both made arrangements with their jobs to just go. Both families pulled out around noon. Called hospital, he's stable, he said yes, you can come. At that point, we were going regardless. The also did another blood pull for leukemia, there were signs of blasts now. The results would be back in a couple days. If it was that, he wasn't strong enough for dialysis. Side note... Mom went into the hospital and was diagnosed (bone marrow pull) with leukemia just six years prior. No, we didn't know she had it. We were told that it was most likely from her treatments for breast cancer. She died just days later on November 9. We buried her on November 13, 2015. Back to Daddy... Contued call from hospital, his kidneys were failing, and cretin levels of 3.3 were triple. Daddy said he was done. No more tests, no more blood, make home comfortable. He was told we were coming and his comment was... Let's get me shaved, my girls are coming. That didn't happen. I got a call around 7pm from the hospital asking how far away we were. They knew we were coming from Texas. He was moved to the critical care unit. Keep driving, he's getting restless. He knows you're coming. We got there around 9pm. In route, we had communicated with all the family. He asked how he could die, what did the hospital need to let him go, he was done. I remember asking him how Mom did it...he didn't know, he guessed that she just went to sleep. Patti said that when it was time, God would show him how. We both told him it was ok to go to sleep and go see our Mom, his beloved Jo. He left us at 6:20 the following morning. The paperwork came in on Saturday, cause of death was GI bleed, acute renal failure. Reading through the packet...he did have a form leukemia. We had a memorial in Perryville the following evening. Visiting in Rockwall on following Tuesday, and laid his body to rest on November 13, six years to the day after mom. For those that are wondering... Mom's leukemia was most likely from cancer treatment exposure to chemo/radiation. Dad's could have been from years of smoking or ... We will never know. Genetic, highly doubtful. Getting checked? Yes. 23 & Me kit came in yesterday. Highly unusual to lose both parents with two days warning, no real symptoms, and bury them on the same day. Now you know what we know. Still have questions... So do we. His apartment was not tidy. Dirty dishes, paperwork everywhere, DNR paper in several places. Did he know? I think so. I don't think he expected this fast. There were photos of mom on every wall in his apartment. Was he ready, yes. He was huge in Perryville and had touched so many lives.  He told me more than once, I'm a fight or flight guy. He moved back to his hometown and made a new life after mom died. Only a couple people there actually knew his whole story. I'm glad the he found happiness, was content, and could make a difference there. Thanx for loving (my dad) Clyde. - Pam.

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